Relationship blogger and Psychologist, Joro Olumofin has a piece of advce and also questions for ladies (side chicks) who date ‘unattainable men’, that is men who are committed by love or law to someone else e.g. married men, fiancé.
Read the interestng article below and tell us what you think….
This topic is one of the most common social & maladaptive issues in our Generation. Before I begin I’d like to define two concepts; (I) side chick (II) unattainable men.
(I) SideChick: This is a Lady who is intentionally or Unintentionally in love or infatuated with a Man who is committed to another Lady by Law or Love i.e. he has a girlfriend or wife.
(II) Unattainable Man: This is man who is deeply committed to another Lady and most times has a lot of wealth or success.
This being said, it’s so sad today to see a lot of young bright, beautiful, well educated ladies waste years or months of their lives In pursuit of unattainable men, to be fair and honest some ladies do not know that some of these men are married or have a girlfriend because some men are skilled in hiding their significant other.
But there are some Ladies who are fully aware that a man is taken and has a family but still fall in love with him, which ends up distracting him from his basic duties to his family. Often both women will place financial demands on him, plan separate birthday parties for him, travel with him before or after Valentine’s Day, send nude pictures to him, some even go as far as attacking or prank calling his wife from time to time; telling her “my breast is your man’s pillow” or please feed your man I’m tired of cooking for him.
My Questions: Why dedicate your life to a man that may never be yours? Why play number 2 or believe a man when he tells you he’ll make you number 1? Why breakup a happy home? Why be with a man who left his wife or girlfriend for you? If he leaves his wife or girlfriend for you, how are you sure he wouldn’t do the same to you? Why build the foundation of your relationship on someone’s sorrow?
It is valid to assert that some of the ladies who this applies to are living in a “self inflicted fantasy” where their minds and cognition are fixed on having a fairy tale ending with another Lady’s Man or husband.
Efforts should be put into Building your own relationships not hijacking another persons own. May your man not encounter a seasoned SideChick. Amen!
Written by Joro Olumofin